If you hear a very long, very loud, shrill scream...

...it is just me. Pay no attention. You may understand when I tell you I have a son with his driver's permit.

He goes to school at Willamette Leadership Academy so he must be dropped off and picked up at the bus stop every day. This affords him plenty of opportunities to drive with me in the car. Oh, goody.

I am not a good person to teach someone to drive. I could be what you might call--uptight. Slightly. I told my husband: "YOU are going to have to teach him to drive. I CAN NOT do it." Well, he does get to drive with his dad. They leave home for a 20 minute drive and they are gone for an hour. I call because I think they have been in a wreck.

Me: Where are you?

Husband: Driving around.

Me: You said you were going to be gone 20 minutes. What are you doing?

Husband: We missed a few turns. He is looking for a place to turn around.

That is always what happens. They are always looking for a place to turn around when I call. Our driving instruction methods differ, I think.

His: Tell kid where they are going. Show him where he was supposed to turn as they pass it. Kid gets flustered. Tries to find a place to turn around. Picks the wrong place. Finally gets turned around. Tries to change lanes but doesn't look first so he almost hits someone. His dad says he missed the turn again.

Is it any wonder the driving lesson takes an hour?

Mine: Tell kid where we are going. Say: "Stop here. Pull forward enough so you can see. Go, there aren't any cars coming. Take your foot off the gas when you shift. We are turning right up here in a mile so be prepared. Slow down. Slow down. :::scream::: SLOW DOWN! Turn. You could accelerate a little faster, you know. Stay in your own lane when you go around a corner (even if he is, it doesn't hurt to remind him). Watch the stop light. Slow down. Stop. Stop. :::scream::: STOP! Don't stop so far back from the line." You get the idea. I never shut up.

Is it any wonder that the poor kid has been declining to drive with me lately?

Hot dog! It worked!